


Stanman Stories

by Stan_is_style



Category: South Park
Genre: Alpha Cartman, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Middle School, Alternate Universe - Stripper/Exotic Dancer, Angst, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Bisexual Cartman, Bisexual Stan, Bottom Stan, Butters Stotch - Freeform, Butters is a cinnamon roll, Cartman does care about Stan though, Cats, Depression, Drabble, Eric Cartman - Freeform, Eric Cartman Being Eric Cartman, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Kenny McCormick - Freeform, Kenny is golden, Kids, Kyle is his feisty self, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Mentioned Kyle Broflovski, Omega Stan, Out of Character sometimes, Past Cartman x Heidi, Randy is a bit of a jackass but ultimately cares, Rare Pairings, Referenced butters x Kenny, Sharon is the best mother, Short, Stan Marsh - Freeform, Stan and Wendy are friends, Stan is also a cinnamon roll, Teenagers, bullied, butters x kenny, heidi turner - Freeform, kyle x Wendy - Freeform, kyndy - Freeform, one shots, stanman - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-29
Updated: 2018-12-01
Packaged: 2019-06-16 20:08:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15444864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stan_is_style/pseuds/Stan_is_style
Summary: What if Stan and Cartman were actually in a relationship?Stan x Cartman one-shotsComments are much appreciated :)





	1. Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stan’s life is pretty shitty. His parents are always fighting, he just came out as bi and people love spreading rumours.To Top it all off, he develops a crush on the person he’s expected to hate. What could possibly get worse?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW/ Depression and referenced self harm.

It was a long day at school for Stan.  
Now being 13 and starting his teen years he had a lot on his shoulders. He had changed a bit since he was 10: he still wore his blue and red poofball hat. He also had braces and black framed glasses which he absolutely hated (being quite smart and in the advance classes made him get called a nerd a lot). He wore black stud earrings: he always liked the goth type style. He always wore red converse, blue jeans and a brown hoodie. Against contrary belief, Stan was actually quite short and preferred more creative activities than sports.

Many girls swooned over him not just because he was in fact good looking but also for the fact that he was determined and smart but they didn’t know one thing.

He had a crush on Eric Cartman.

It may seem crazy, hell even Stan thought it was crazy but it was true. Stan figured that Eric’s fondness of cats always charmed him. Cartman was at least 4 inches taller than him and was bigger no surprise. Cartman didn’t change much in personality. He still had a rivalry with Kyle. Stan was actually good friends with Cartman and hung out with him. Kyle didn’t even know about this. Stan figured it was better that way. But he wanted to let his group know why he had been so confused and down lately.

He decided to come out as bisexual to his friends. It was a part of the burden that he had (he wouldn’t mention Eric). They were all supportive, especially Kyle and Kenny. Kenny even tried to hit on him, being the little pervert he was.

Cartman was harder to tell though. Stan expected to be called a fag but nothing was said. The usual racist, foul mouthed sociopath seemed distant: his mind somewhere else. Stan was confused for sure but he was glad that he wasn’t ridiculed.

Unfortunately, some kid overheard the confession and decided to spread it all over the school through eavesdropper. Middle school is full of malicious snakes: honestly it’s not a nice place to be. Some where glad that one of their peers had the courage to say it but some weren’t as supportive.

When Stan walked to his locker, everyone whispered and stared like a hawk as he passed by. A random 9th grader came up behind him and shoved him to the ground.

“Look at the emo fag,” the older boy mocked as he pointed at Stan who was picking up all of his homework.

“What the hell is your problem, you fucking dick!” Stan snarled, glaring at the brute above him.

“You think you can smart mouth me kid? Well, you have another thing coming,” the 9th grader kicked Stan with force in the stomach which resulted with the smaller boy to crawl in a ball. Tears threatened to escape his sapphire eyes when he heard people around him snicker.

“Awww look, he’s gonna cry!” A girl called out. Stan lifted his head to see that people were filming. He picked himself back up and ran to the boy’s bathroom. He held in the tears as he checked his lower abdomen. No doubt, it was bruised and swollen. He looked at himself in the mirror and brushed his raven hair back. He kept a mask of pride to hide his sadness. He was used to acting normal to others but he wasn’t actually that happy. Another secret he couldn’t tell anyone:

He had depression.

Stan kept his head down during the day and concentrated on his work to get his mind from everything. He avoided his friends and just sat in the music department to clear his mind and play his flute. The music soothed him: the soft melody filling his ears. Unfortunately, classes had to resume. The school day seemed to drag on forever until the home bell rang. 

Stan decided against taking the bus home since all the assholes rode it. A walk would be nice even though it was blistering cold. He took a detour home and walked passed the stores and through the park.  
Music blasted from his ear buds to drown out any noise from the outside world.

Once he returned home, he walked in to see his mom and dad arguing again.

“Randy! Can’t you tell that our son is depressed? We had a chat last night and he told me everything. He cut himself!” Sharon screamed at her husband.

“God Sharon it’s just some teenage angst that he’ll get over in a couple of years. You said it was only a couple of cuts so it’s not that bad!” Randy drunkly babbled.

“OF COURSE ITS BAD RANDY! DO YOU EVEN CARE ABOUT YOUR ONLY SON? HE NEEDS HELP.”

“It’s not my fault that he’s a useless pussy!” Randy slurred.

Stan dropped his backpack on the floor as the words sliced through his heart. “Is that how you feel Dad? That I’m a useless pussy?” Stan whispered has tears ran down his cheeks.

Sharon ran over to her son and embraced him in a hug, “he’s just being a drunk piece of shit hunny. Don’t listen to him.”  
Sharon turned to Randy and shot him a death glare, “Get out!”

“What?”

“I SAID GET OUT OF MY HOUSE YOU DRUNKEN ASSHOLE. YOU ARE FUCKING UNBELIEVABLE!”

Randy looked genuinely concerned,” I’m sorry,”

“No Randy just get out you’ve said enough.”

Randy huffed has he slammed the door shut. Stan departed from his mother.

“I need some time alone mom.” He croaked as he ran out the door. He raced down the street and into the woods. He finally came to stop when he reached Starks Pond. 

Stan slumped onto the bench and sobbed loudly into his knees.

“I just want to die!” He screamed aloud, pulling tightly on his black locks,” I fucking want to die!”

Tears flowed like a waterfall to the ground as his sobbing got worse. He suddenly felt someone hold his shoulder. Stan whipped his head around to see no other than Eric Cartman.

“C-Cartman,” Stan stammered in between heavy breathes, “leave me alone please.”

“I’m afraid I can’t do that Marsh,” he replied sitting on the space next to him.

“If you’re here to rip on me then just go ahead: I can’t take anything anymore,” Stan said in between his hyperventilating.

Cartman looked sincere, “ no I don’t want to rip on you. I was walking home from the park and heard you scream. I thought you were getting raped or something. So, I came.”

“Even if I was, why would you care? You would probably video it and post it online.”

“No I wouldn’t. I can be a dick but I wouldn’t do that. If it’s Kahl then-“ 

“Listen dude, you don’t need to pretend that you care because I know nobody cares about me,” Stan looked up, his piercing blue orbs stared straight into Eric’s chocolate ones.

Cartman flicked some of Stan’s hair from his eyes,” you’re joking right?”

Stan sighed, “ no Eric. I just... I just want to die.”

Cartman grabbed Stan’s hand, “ don’t talk like that. People would be so sad if you died. Jew, poor boy, your family... me.”

Stan scoffed, “ yeah right, like my dad would care. And you...”

“Can you tell me everything that happened?”

Stan sniffed and just let it all out. His parents, the bullies, the depression, the cuts. Everything.  
“I’m a loser huh,” Stan finished.

Cartman blink in disbelief, “ I never knew you felt this way. I used to think you were just a bummer because you thought you were more mature but now..” Cartman cupped Stan’s face in his large hands,” I understand that you’ve been through a lot.”

Stan blushed,” and there’s one more thing that’ll make you pissed.”

“What?”

“I l-li-like-“  
Cartman interrupted him by kissing him on his lips gently. Stan’s eyes widened. It was short but sweet.

“I can’t tell you how long I’ve waited to do that,” Cartman smiled.

Stan blushed even more, “ you’ve liked me all this time?”

“I have for awhile. When you came out as bi, it made me think about how I might have a chance.”

Stan gave him a hug, “ I’ve liked you too.”

“Stan, will you be my boyfriend?” Cartman asked.

“Yes.”

“Sweet, jew will be sooooo jealous!”

They embraced each other in a tight hug.

Cartman broke away for a moment," oh and Stan..."

"Yeah?" Stan asked.

"I saw the cuts during PE class the other day."

"You did!?" Stan's eyes widened significantly.

"Yeah. You have seemed weirder lately."

"Oh," Stan looked down embarrassed.

Cartman lifted up his chin and stared deep into Stan's eyes," Never do it again. If you even THINK about it, I won't hesitate to kick your ass back to sanity."

Stan chuckled softly," Ok Eric."


	2. Kyle...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cartman and Stan start dating but they still haven’t told Kyle: the person who hates Cartman with a passion. How will he react? Hopefully better than Stan expects.

Stan stood at the bus stop with his gloved fingers entwined through Cartman’s. It was just a usual school day in South Park. The snow fell heavily to the white path adding more depth to the ground below. The mist caused by the freezing air created a cloudy atmosphere that laid upon the mountain town. Stan kicked the snow with his black boots with force.

“I fucking hate this redneck town,” he mumbled under his breath.

Cartman looked down to the smaller boy, “ why are you so on edge? On your period?”

Stan proceeded to kick his boyfriend’s leg, “ shut up Fatass, I’m just worried.”

“About what?” 

Stan sighed,” I haven’t told Kyle about... Well us.”

“Do you really need to tell the Jew,”Cartman rolled his eyes,” he doesn’t need to know shit.”

“It’s just that he’s my SBF. I haven’t been sleeping well by keeping this a huge secret. It just adds on to that I haven’t even came out as bisexual to my parents,” Stan bit his lip, the braces digging in roughly.

Cartman grabbed Stan’s poofball hat and held it above his head to taunt him.

“If ya keep worrying your little ass off, I’ll keep the hat,” Cartman snickered,” anyways, if things don’t go to plan with Kahl and your parents, you can live with me and eat all the ice- cream ya want.”

“And be fat like you, I don’t think so,” Stan chuckled.

“Ay! I’m not fat, I’m big boned!”

“Well you must have a huge bone in your ass then,” another voice shouted from down the sidewalk.

Stan literally leapt at the sound of that certain voice and hastily let go of Cartman’s hand. 

Kyle tugged at the green ushanka on top of his ginger curls. He eyed Stan then Cartman.

“Why do you have Stan’s hat  
,Cartman?” Kyle asked as he stood beside Stan.

“H-he’s just teasing me,” Stan answered while fidgeting with his black hair.

“Well give him back his hat then Fatass,” Kyle hissed at Cartman

“Whatever Kahl. Trying to sway me with your jew tactics.”

“DON’T BELITTLE MY PEOPLE YOU FUCKING FATASS,” Kyle screamed.

“Shut up you shifty jew,” Cartman retorted.

Stan pinched the bridge of his nose. Why does this happen every day?  
As if on cue, the bus pulled up.  
The boys huffed as they found their usual seats: Kyle and Stan sit near the back and Cartman sits in the front next to Butters.

Kyle fished his phone from his pockets to text Wendy. 

“I hope Wendy has some of the formulae for our Science homework, I could only do the formulae [Mg]2+[O]2, which is the way you write the elements that form magnesium oxide”, Kyle babbled on.

Stan just nodded blankly,” so how are you and Wendy.”

“We’re fine. We went on a date to the museum on Saturday. I still feel a bit guilty that I’m dating your ex though dude.”

“Nah it’s ok, we broke up at the start of 5th grade,” Stan smiled weakly,” Wendy is right for you. We are really good friends actually so she tells me how she’s really into you.”

“It’s good that you have matured since 4th grade Stan. You definitely are more accepting, especially with me and Wendy,”Kyle replied.

“Well we all get over past relationships. It happens until you’ve found your soul mate.”

“Dude that’s gay,” Kyle laughed.

“Well I do like a bit of both worlds,” Stan winked,” god I sound like Kenny.”

“Where even is Kenny?”

“Dunno. Probably just ditching,” Kyle shrugged.

“He probably died again,” Cartman piped up from the front.

“Don’t be so stupid Cartman! Kenny didn’t die. And what do you mean again?” Kyle challenged.

“Doesn’t matter.”

They all carried on their mindless chatter. Except from Stan. He just fumbled with his earphones as he stared out the window to see the snowy canopy. The anxiety that was bubbling inside of him made his stomach churn. His face turned ghostly pale.

“Dude are you ok?” Kyle asked with concern.

“Just travel sickness. I’m fi-“ He projectile vomited onto the seat in front of him.

“AWWWW SICK DUDE!” Kyle shouted as he scrambled onto the opposite seat.

Stan just looked around to all the disgusted faces of everyone on the bus. His face turned a shade of green and was sick again out of embarrassment.

“EWWWWWW!” The whole bus screamed.

Luckily, the bus came to a holt as they arrived at school. Everyone hurried from the bus to get away from Stan. The only people who waited was Kyle and Cartman.

“Are you ok ba- I mean hippy,” Cartman asked.

Kyle furrowed his eyebrows with confusion but quickly dismissed the statement.

“Yeah, just a bug is all,” Stan lied.

“Well I’m taking you to the nurses office,” Kyle announced as he grabbed his best friends wrist and began to drag him through the doors. 

“No Kyle I’m fine honestly!” Stan exclaimed as he pulled his hand away, “ I’ll go to first period and see if I’m ok.”

Kyle just shook his head with disapproval,” ok then. What is your first class?”

“Advanced math.”

“Right I’ve got Geography. Meet me at the Library during break,” Kyle waved and ran off to find his girlfriend to help him with homework.

Stan wondered off to his locker to see Cartman waiting for him.

“Hey! You nearly called me babe back there,” Stan scolded.

“Well it’s hard since we are like dating,” Cartman retorted.

“Well I’m gonna tell him at the end of the day.” Stan concluded, “ that means that nobody will be around.”

“Want me to tag along too?”

“Nah. I’ll have a one on one talk with him and I’ll call you when I get home.”

“Ok then. I’ll walk with you to class then,” Cartman held Stan’s hand as they waded through the hoards of people.

“Way to be subtle,” Stan whispered.

“It’s not a big deal.”

Stan just tried to forget about the whole situation and carried on with his day.

 

Time skip to the end of the school day:

Stan waited for Kyle by the massive oak tree across from the Middle School. Kyle saw his best friend and ran towards him.

“Guess what!” Kyle jumped excitedly.

“What?” Stan asked.

“Me and Wendy got an A* on the project!” Kyle squealed.

“Well done Ky! I’ll have to text Wendy later to congratulate her too.”

They carried on down the street in silence. Stan looked around and saw that nobody was around.

“Are you ok Stan? You seem a little... off.”

“Kyle, you would want me to tell you anything, right?” Stan clutched his arm.

“Yeah, we’re SBFs after all. There’s nothing you can’t tell me.”

“But would you hate me if I said it?”

“Stan, just tell me. Whatever it is, it can’t be that awful.” Kyle patted the shorter boys back.

“I’m dating Cartman,” Stan blurted out.

Kyle froze on the spot. His face showed many emotions in the space of a couple of seconds. He turned back to Stan.

“You’re kidding, right?”

Stan shook his head, “no. Me and Cartman are dating. He’s my boyfriend.”

Kyle began to shiver. With anger.

“Cartman obviously blackmailed you to do this. You would never-“

“He didn’t blackmail me. I’m doing this willingly. I fell for Cartman,” Stan held his backpack straps with stress.

“NO YOU DIDN’T! YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU WANT. YOU ARE SUCH A DUMBASS STAN.” Kyle shouted.

Stan felt the tears prick his eyes,” you were fine when I first came out.”

“Yeah, when you weren’t dating the person we hate. You could’ve chose anyone to be gay with and you choose that hunk of shit?”

“I hate? You are the one that despises him Kyle, not me. I actually get along with him just fine,” Stan began to lose his usual mild temper,” and I can’t choose who I like.”

“Yes you can! First you turn into a cynical asshole, then you do this! How could you do this to me!” 

“To you? You are being so selfish Kyle. You don’t know why I act in certain ways. You always left me when times got rough. I always stood by you. I was gonna give my kidney to you when you were dying. I would die for you Kyle. We’re best friends,” Stan cried.

“I don’t understand why you act certain ways. I admit that. But you sometimes are a bummer to be around. You decided to turn against the only thing you have left Stan. Some sense of morals,” Kyle snapped with venom,” you are clearly insane at this point and you are beyond help. If Cartman is the thing you love, you have issues.”

Stan brushed away the tears the ran down his cheek,” I’m going to Cartman’s,” he whispered.

“GO TO HIM THEN STAN! YOU ARE SUCH AN IDIOT. I HATE YOU!” Kyle screamed.

Stan just stood there blankly. Kyle flipped him off and sauntered away. He took out his phone and called Cartman.

“Hey hippy how did it go?” Cartman asked through the phone.

Stan sniffed,” I’m going home. I’m done with this world. There’s nothing I’m worth anymore.”

“Stan, don’t you dare do anything stupid.” Cartman demanded.

Stan just hung up and ran back to his house. He tore up the stairs and fell onto his bed. He sobbed loudly into the duvet that smothered his face. He was crying that loudly that he never heard Cartman walk through his bedroom door.

“Shhhh it’s ok,” Cartman lifted him up and hugged him tightly, “let it all out.”

Stan continued to hyperventilate into the broad shoulder, “ I-I-I hate my life.”

Cartman rubbed his back in circles,” I’m here now. Take deep breaths babe.”

Stan tried to calm himself down by following what Cartman said. He gazed into Cartman’s hazel eyes with his blue ones.

“Tell me everything that dumb jew said to you.”

Stan spilled out everything and he could feel Cartman’s grip on his hand get tighter.

“I’ll be back soon Stan. I’ve got some business to take care of,” Cartman gritted his teeth and stormed out the Marsh residence.

Cartman walked onto the Broflovski’s porch and banged on the door. A couple of moments later, his enemy opened the door.

“WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM KAHL!” Cartman shouted.

“What did you do to Stan Fatass?” Kyle hissed,” you obviously made him brain dead!”

“Don’t you dare insult my boyfriend. And you know nothing Kahl!”

“Oh and what do I not know about then. I’ve known him since diapers. I know everything about him,” Kyle snapped.

“Did you know that he has depression? Did you know that he hates his life? DID YOU KNOW THAT HIS DAD IS A STUPID DRUNK THAT CALLED HIM USELESS?” Cartman spat.

Kyle stood flabbergasted,” excuse me.”

“Exactly Kahl. He thought you would at least be willing to support him even if you hated me. But here we are.”

Kyle’s anger turned to guilt, “I never knew he felt that way.”

“He cut himself Kahl. He needs support. But you being the no good jew that you are, made him feel 10x worse. When he called me, I thought he was gonna kill himself! DO YOU KNOW HOW SCARY THAT IS KAHL?” Cartman screamed.

Kyle blinked back tears,” oh my god. He really did? I thought he was just a cynic who hated everything for no reason. Has he drank?”

“What do you mean?”

“When I left him in 4th grade, he got drunk.” Kyle whispered.

“No he hasn’t drank yet Kahl. And you better hope he didn’t. For your sake,” Cartman left Kyle stricken at the doorway and headed back.

Fortunately, Stan was just laying on his bed, staring at the ceiling.

“I got you some ice cream,” Cartman explained as he lifted Stan into his arms, “Kahl regrets everything.”

“I just want everything to go back to the way it was,” Stan sighed into Cartman’s chest,” let’s just watch some movies.”

Cartman smiled,” I’m gonna give you so much ice cream that you’ll be a Fatass.”

Stan laughed softly,” Yeah probably.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notes: I’m so sorry that I made Kyle an asshole guys. I actually really like Kyle but I thought this is how he would react.


	3. In love with a stripper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cartman and Kenny decide to have a night out at the club and see something they weren’t expecting at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I came up with this idea while listening to Eminem. So here it is. Tw/ attempted non-con and adult themes.

Stan:

Every night Stan had a regular routine. He would go home from high school and finish any homework or projects that were due in for finals. Being a senior was tough but Stan was actually one of the most intelligent so he could survive. Then, he would have a quick shower and dress into his work gear. He would always hide it underneath a baggy hoodie and sweatpants too. His makeup bag, and any other necessities were always in his backpack before he dared to step foot from his house. 

Stan always waited until his parents were pre-occupied or out somewhere when he left the house. 

Tonight was no exception.

Stan was about to leave the house to go to work when his mother noticed him.

"Stanley, honey where are you going? It's getting late," Sharon asked while washing up the dishes.

"I'm just going to Kyle's house for some extra study time. Ill be back for about midnight."

"I know you're 18 hun but isn't that a little late to stay out till," Sharon frowned," It's not safe out in the streets after dark."

Stan gave a reassuring smile," I'll be careful mom. I've done this plenty of times before."

Sharon sighed," ok Stan. Off you go." She took off her rubber gloves and ruffled his black hair.

"Thanks mom." 

Stan began to make his way out the door when Randy decided to chime in from the couch while drinking his crate of beer.

"Where are you going young man?"

"Out." Stan spat clearly annoyed and slammed the front door. 

He rang for an Uber to pick him up from just outside the photo dojo on the Main Street in South Park. Whilst walking in the prickling cold, all Stan could feel was guilt. Guilt because he lied to his mother: the person who actually cared for his well-being. The truth was that he was going to the strip club just outside of town. 

Yes,he was a stripper.

Stan never wanted to work as one and it never crossed his mind until he found out that he would have to pay college fees and rent when he graduated high school in a few months. His stupid father wastes most of the family money on alcohol  which makes them tight on cash. They are just barely passing by in the bills. Stan could have chosen a job anywhere like City Wok but Kenny informed him that this job pays more if you have the looks. Stan didn't think so but everyone who met him fell in love with him instantly. He had to get this job to further his chances on becoming a vet. His 10 year old self would be ashamed. To be honest, everyone else would be: especially his mom.

So there he was, walking alone in the clutches of the misty air, caught amidst in his thoughts and self-doubt. He soon arrived to the row of stores on Main Street and saw the flickering light from the car. Stan practically ran towards it and climbed into the back seat.

"Is this for Mr Marsh?" The driver asked reading from his phone.

"Y-yes. I'm heading down to the Peppermint Hippo on FairPlay Road."Stan replied shyly.

"Oh I see you are gonna have some fun down there aren't ya," the driver commented,starting the ignition.

"Not exactly," Stan muttered.

The driver looked through the windscreen window to where Stan was," wow... you are really handsome lad. I'm sure you can pull any girl ya want."

"I'm not too interested in finding girls," Stan mumbled, "this isn't just a fun night out."

"So you're a homo!" The driver exclaimed," I'm sure there's plenty of dic-"

"Can we just not talk about it?" Stan cut him off," and I'm not gay either."

Stan plugged in his headphones to drown out any interaction from the outside world and gazed out the window. The stars littered the night sky and shone brightly in the distance. Stan stared wistful into the array of beauty in the sky. The snow flakes that were falling fluttered gracefully onto the ground, creating something that Stan called 'the South Park scenery'. It reminded him of the innocence from his early childhood.

Around 20 minutes later, the car came to a holt and dragged Stan back to reality. Stan sighed and handed over $10 to the driver. He ushered himself out of the car and onto the snowy ground. He looked ahead and sighed as he entered through the back door into the club.

"Welcome to hell," he thought to himself.

 

Cartman:

Cartman was sick of studying for his test and decided to text Kenny.

Cartman: yo poor boi. fucking bored. got anything to do.

Kenny: thinking on going to the Peppermint Hippo. Wanna cum?

Cartman: sure ya are ya poor slut. 

Kenny: well fuck you fatass. I'll go with Kyle instead.

Cartman: no way the jew is coming. I'll drive to yours in 5.

Kenny: k. See ya then ass for brains

Cartman huffed as he threw on his jacket. Poor piece of crap. 

"Mom I'm going out," he screamed to Liane who was cooking something.

"Hun I was about to make some pot pie for you and you have a test coming up soon."

"But meeemm, me and Kinny were gonna go out and do something kewllllll," he whined.

"But Eric..."

"BUT MEEEEMMM!!!" Cartman screamed and continued with inaudible and fast words.

"Ok. Ok. Have fun muffin," she cooed while kissing his forehead.

Cartman angrily pushed away and stormed out the door. He got into his moms car and drove down to Kennys house. When he got there, he saw Kenny barging in between his parents who were screaming at eachother. Yet again.

"Shut yo fucking mouth woman!" Stuart drunkenly slurred.

"Fuck you, you crack addict low life!" Carol yelled back.

When Kenny entered the car, Cartman gave him a look.

"Goddamn your parents suck Kinny."

"Well mom spent dads beer money on some new equipment for Karen," Kenny shrugged," they argue daily. I just want to let Karen leave this redneck town."

Cartman scoffed," don't we all."

"So are ya planning on seeing any hot guys tonight," Kenny wiggled his eyebrows.

"Eh. Ya didn't tell me this was a guys club!"

"Well it is now. Anyways, you are pretty gay dude," Kenny winked.

"Shut yo mouth! I'm totally not," Cartman snapped.

"Oh really? I've seen the way you gaze at Stan during classes," Kenny retorted," don't worry your secret is safe with McCormick."

"More like McWhoremick!"

"Hey, I'm not denying that I like the D. You are," Kenny laughed.

"Fineeeee I like the hippy. Satisfied?" Cartman hissed.

"I guess. Let's get a move on then," Kenny ordered.

Cartman started the ignition as they drove the 20 minutes to the club. All the way there, Kenny was coming up with scenarios on how to hook Stan and Cartman together.

"Dude he's bi! Ya have a chance," Kenny exclaimed as they reversed into a parking space.

"Shut up Kinny!!!!" Cartman shouted.

"Oh it looks like we're here. Let's go have some fun in da club!" Kenny cheered.

Cartman only pushed him out the car and followed the blonde inside.  
When they entered, bright neon lights flashed in all directions except for the stage which was in darkness for the time being. There was a bar on the opposite side where people were getting shots.

"So how are we gonna get drinks Kinny. We're only 18," Cartman asked.

"Oh, I wasn't planning on getting drunk tonight dude. The thought of my father and his drinking put me off," Kenny dismissed," also I need to help Karen with a project when I get back."

"God you suck. You were the first person at my birthday party to get shitfaced," Cartman frowned," well I guess I can't drink because I have to drive your broke ass back to the ghetto."

"Whatever dude," Kenny rolled his eyes," anyways let's get to the stage. It starts like now."

Kenny grabbed Cartman's wrist and lead him to the front of the stage. The lights began to fade in the club and the DJ spoke into the microphone.

"Let's get this party started!  The first up is the clubs biggest attraction. Let's give it up for Raven!"

Shake that by Eminem began to play when the light on the stage shone on the pole. Then, the most beautiful being entered the stage.

He had raven black hair that shone like a crow's wing. His sapphire blue eyes pierced through everyone's hearts as they surveyed the audience. The black eyeliner and black eye shadow that traced his eyes made them stand out more in the bright light. Who knew that someone could pull of blue and black so well.

His stomach was not muscly but it was slim and toned. Glitter was spread across his shoulder blades and it sparkled as he twirled on the pole. He wore black studded earrings and very short black shorts. 

Cartman watched in awe at the sight beyond him: it seems like the boy cast a spell upon everyone with his dark magic. Upon further observation, Cartman noticed something. This was Stan! His friend and his crush.

"Kinny, ya know that guy up there," Cartman whispered in Kenny's ear.

"Yeah? He's so sexy."

"It's Stan goddammit!"

Kenny blinked and looked from Cartman to the stage," holy shit! You're right: that's definitely Stan. I'd recognise that vanilla and cologne scent from anywhere."

"Is this why he's always tired at school?" Cartman pondered.

"Probably. Let's talk to him when he finishes the routine."

A couple of minutes later, the music came to an end and Stan smiled before he walked off the stage. The crowd went wild when he disappeared to the back.

"That was Raven!" The DJ spoke above everyone's response to the noirette they just watched.

Kenny tapped Cartman's shoulder," I'm going for a shit. I'll meet you outside in 5."

Cartman nodded as the blonde sauntered off. He barged his way through the crowd to the doors. As soon as he got outside, the cold smacked him in the face. There was obviously going to be a snow storm soon. 

Suddenly, he heard some guys talking round the back.

"What's a pretty thing like you doing outside?" a gruff voice asked.

"I-I'm just having a break," a timid voice replied.

There was thump on the wall and muffled cries ensued. 

"You were asking for it when you were on that stage, you slut," another guy hissed.

"The hell," Cartman wondered.

There was smack heard from the alley and a small whimper.

That was enough for Cartman's ears. He stormed over to the alley to see a shocking sight. There was Stan pressed against the wall with his wrists held above him. A hand covered his mouth to muffle his pleads. Tears filled up his eyes as one of the guys punched him in the stomach. 

"Hey you assholes," Cartman shouted furiously, "let him go."

Stan's eyes darted towards Cartman and they widened at the sight of the fat boy.

"Oh and what are you going to do about it," one of the guys snickered," he obviously wants what he's going to get."

Stan shook his head vigorously. Cartman ran over to the guy that held him and punched him with full force in the face.

"God, this kids insane. Let's bail," the guy holding Stan exclaimed.

"Yeah," Stan was let go and the men ran away into the night. Cartman turned back as Stan fell to the ground and curled himself into a ball.

Kenny then arrived to see the clearly stricken boy on the ground.

"Dude! What happened?" Kenny asked as Cartman held Stan in his arms.

"He was nearly raped," Cartman replied in a soft tone," go get his stuff from inside Kinny. I'll take him back to the car."  

Kenny nodded sympathetically and hurried back inside. Cartman took off his large  red jacket and wrapped it around Stan's shivering form.

"It's cold out tonight and you aren't wearing much," Cartman gestured to Stan's shorts," let's get you back in the car."

Cartman scooped him up from the ground and carried him to the car. Stan just sobbed into Cartman's chest until he was placed on the front seat. 

"There's a blanket in the trunk. I'll go and fetch it," Cartman got the blanket out and bundled Stan in it.

"I don't know why you're here and why you helped," Stan whispered.

"Kinny dragged me out here for something to do," Cartman shrugged," and I'm not just gonna let you get fucked in an alley ,Stan.

"Thank you for saving me," Stan gave a weak smile," if you weren't there I would've been in trouble."

"No problem hippy," Cartman smirked.

Just on cue, Kenny came back with Stan's bag and clothes. He opened the front door and embraced Stan in a hug.

"I'm glad you're alright. As your best friend, I couldn't live with myself if you were seriously hurt," Kenny cried.

"Thanks dude," Stan replied meekly.

Kenny clambered in the back and Cartman drove him home. Kenny's parents were arguing inside again. 

"Well I'm not surprised. Well I'll see you guys on Monday," Kenny patted Stan's shoulder, "and hang in there dude."

Kenny ran through the snow and back into his house. Cartman looked at Stan.

"I think you should stay over at my house for the night. The storm's brewing and you're in no state to be left alone."

Stan nodded," can your mom phone my mom. I don't want to explain."

"Sure," Cartman replied. They drove  back to Cartman's house and Cartman carried Stan in since he had no shoes on.

"Meeemmm Stan's staying the night," Cartman shouted to his mother.

"Ok hun," Liane sweetly spoke. She walked in and saw the state Stan was in. She gasped. "What happened Eric ?"

Cartman explained the situation. 

"The poor dear. Stanley, I'll call your mother to tell her that you're staying here for the night and I'll make you some hot cocoa." Liane scurried back into the kitchen.

Cartman sat Stan on the couch and threw the fluffy throw over him. Mr Kitty jumped onto Stan's lap and purred loudly. Stan smiled as he stroked the soft cat.

"Hi, Mr Kitty," Stan whispered to the cat," it's been awhile."

"He likes you," Cartman laughed," he's getting pretty old. He's 12 now."

"That's a good age for a cat. Sparky was 13 when he passed away," tears ran down Stan's cheeks.

Cartman rubbed his back," I know how much you loved that dog. He was pretty gay."

Stan gave a subtle nudge to Cartman's side," Yeah he was. But he was the toughest dog on the mountain."

"You can come over to visit Mr Kitty if ya want. I can tell he loves you already."

"I love animals," Stan replied," I want to be a vet. That's why I'm a stripper. It's to get money for my college fund. My dad spends the allowance on alcohol ,you see. So we only have enough for the bills and food. I just want to earn some money to make a living for myself. I was told that this job pays well so I took it."

"I thought you enjoyed it. You seemed entranced on stage."

"Do you really think I enjoy showing myself off. Do you think that I like dirty men praying on me like I'm nothing but a slut," Stan snapped," I'm a virgin. This isn't something I like to do."

Cartman was taken aback," I'm sorry. I didn't know the situation."

Liane came back with a cup of hot cocoa and handed it over to Stan. "There you go hun. Your mother is fine with you staying over."

"Thanks Mrs Cartman," Stan took a sip of hot chocolate," please can I have some aspirin."

"Of course sweety. Here you go," she handed the tablet capsules over."

Stan took them and sank back into the couch. Cartman held his hand as they watched some TV together to calm Stan.  
Cartman heard heavy breathing and turned around to see that Stan was asleep on his side.

"I'll help you clean up tomorrow. There's bound to be bruises," Cartman thought as he stroked Stan's soft, black hair," I won't let anything happen to you. My little hippy."


	4. Sweet 16th

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cartman wants Stan to have the biggest 16th birthday party. Stan isn’t so sure.

October 1st:

“Come on Cartman there’s no need!”

Stan’s voice remained ignored however as Cartman kept pacing around his living room coming up with ideas.

“What did I tell you Stan, you’re turning 16! Everyone else is older than you and they had rad parties!” Cartman exclaimed.

Stan sighed,” I don’t care about a party Eric. I don’t want to make it a big deal.”

“BIG DEAL. ITS YOUR SWEET 16!!!” Cartman dramatically announced,” you’re getting a party even if I have to force you onto the dance floor.”

Stan huffed with defeat and slumped further into the couch. He never cared for parties that much. Especially if he was the centre of attention.

“Do you always have to over dramatise things?” Stan asked, clearly in a mood.

“God don’t get your titties in a twist hippy! I have to host the best events! Just you wait until our engagement and wedding. Hell, maybe even a baby shower if you ever decide to have kids. They’ll have to broadcast them nation wide for how big they’ll be ,” Cartman fantasised.

“You’re jumping far ahead to the future, aren’t you?” Stan laughed,” I guess I could unwind and have fun.”

“That’s the spirit babe! As long as you don’t get yourself shitfaced, it’ll be great!”

Stan rolled his eyes, “ what’s the matter with getting a little drunk?”

“Knowing you’re stupid ass, you’ll get jumped on by someone. Probably Kenny,” Cartman replied with a hint of harshness in his voice.

“I honestly don’t know what you take me for. I’m not as weak as you think I am,” Stan spat back.

“Oh please, I could write a 1000 page book how you’re a pussy,” Cartman snickered,” anyways, you’re down for the party?”

Stan shrugged,” I guess.”

“Let’s get this show on the road!”

October 19th- Stan’s Birthday:

The warm rays of the Autumn glow shone through the glass window and onto Stan’s face. He grumbled with distaste and buried his head further into his pillow. The task of getting the young raven out of bed was nearly impossible. He was definitely not a morning person.

“Stanley honey, time to get up! It’s your birthday,” Sharon called from downstairs.

“It’s the weekend moooommmm,” he groaned, sounding like Cartman ,” I’ll get up at noon.”

“Stan get you’re whiny ass down here before I drag you out of bed,” Another voice shouted,” it’s already 3 o clock.”

Stan recognised that voice from anywhere. Practically starting out of his duvet, Stan ran into the bathroom to look at himself in the mirror. Sure his hair was a mess and he had dark circles under his eyes but apart from that he looked semi presentable. He threw on his dressing gown to cover the fact he was only wearing his boxers and rushed down the stairs. He noticed his mom and Cartman sitting on the couch, awaiting for his presence.

“You look cute when you first wake up,” Cartman chuckled.

“Shut up dude,” Stan blushed a deep crimson as he sat in between his mother and boyfriend,” where’s Dad?”

“He’s just getting your present from the garage. It was actually Eric’s idea to get you this,” Sharon smiled.

On cue, Randy burst through the front door with a large dark blue box in his arms. He grinned as he carefully placed it on Stan’s lap.

“Be very gentle with it and don’t open until we say,” Randy ordered as he set up a video camera.

Stan was itching with anticipation to find out what was in the box. He looked over to Cartman who had his arm around his back in an embrace. His mom swiped some black stands of hair from his eyes as she gave Randy a thumbs up.

They all counted down from 3 and Stan lifted the lid from the box. 

Stan looked down to see a pair of sapphire eyes stare back at him. He gasped with awe as he lifted it out of the box. In his hands was a, fluffy Ragdoll kitten with a huge red bow tied around its neck. It’s fur was white with dark patches on its ears, tail and nose. It had tiny pink toe beans that were really soft to the touch. The kitten meowed happily at the sight of his new owner.

Stan felt the tears well up in his eyes as he gazed at the fluff ball in his hands. He began to sob with delight as he hugged the kitten, which nuzzled into his chest. His smile could light up the darkest places.

“Happy birthday Stan!” Everyone exclaimed.

“Thank you guys so much!” Stan cried as he stoked the cat softly.

“What are you gonna name him?” Cartman asked as he wiped away some of his boyfriends tears.

“I know. I know!” Randy interrupted,” call him Lorde!”

“I’m not naming him after you Dad,” Stan snapped.

“Randy, it’s not your cat. It’s Stan’s. Let him decide,” Sharon scolded her husband.

Stan thought for a moment,” wait I’ve got the perfect name.”

“What is it?” Everyone asked in unison.

“Lance.”

“Yeah it suits him,” Cartman grinned.

“Well then Lance it is,” Randy said with some hurt,” it still should be called Lorde.”

“Oh stop being childish Randy” Sharon shouted.

“Guys, can we not argue on his birthday?” Cartman sighed.

Stan nodded in agreement as he placed Lance on the floor to roam. He held his hand over his mouth with utter pride as the kitten plodded along the carpet. He reached over to Cartman and cried against his chest. 

“This is the best birthday ever,” he mumbled into the fabric of the shirt.

“Well it’s only just started Stanny boy,” Cartman snickered.

“I’m just wondering how old is Lance?” Sharon piped up.

“I think he’s about 12 weeks old,” Cartman replied,” we can train him, can’t we babe.”

“We sure can. I’m gonna let him have baths and be groomed all the time. He’s gonna look like show cat every day,” Stan gleamed. 

“Welcome the newest edition to the Marsh family!” Randy spoke to the camera, “ tell Shelly about it Stanley!”

“I’d rather not,” Stan muttered.

 

They carried on to play with Lance until Stan decided to was time his new roommate got settled. He carried the tiny kitten in his arms upstairs with Cartman following close behind. When they got to the room, Cartman locked the door and placed a small bed near Stan’s nightstand.

“Ya know he’ll barely use that, right. He’ll be with me,” Stan giggled.

“Don’t forget me asswipe. I’m here more than anyone,” Cartman played along.

Stan placed Lance in his new bed and the kitten curled up and fell asleep immediately. He then went into his bathroom to brush his teeth and have a shower. Cartman snuck up behind him and ripped off his dressing gown.

“Do you fucking mind, Fatass?” Stan nearly shrieked at the sudden coldness.

Cartman mused,” why are you only in your boxers anyway?”

“Because it’s what I wear for bed sometimes so can you just go away and stop sexually harassing me whilst I get ready?”

Stan carried on with his morning routine and actually decided to give a shit about his appearance today. He wore blue skinny jeans with a white shirt. He wore his brown jacket like always. He styled his black hair and put on his poofball hat that he still owned. After applying some black eyeliner and spraying some cologne on, he was ready for the party.

“Right I’m ready,” Stan said as he walked out the bathroom.

“Why are you wearing your everyday clothes? This is your big birthday bash Stan!” Cartman frowned,” I’m just gonna have to dress you.”

“In what?” Stan sounded suspicious.

“You’ll see,” Cartman bluntly replied as he covered Stan’s eyes with a blindfold.

“Oh come on Cartman! Can we do the kinky shit later, like when I turn 18,” Stan whined.

“Who said we’re having sex. You have such a dirty mind,” Cartman whispered,” I just don’t want you to see what the outfit is yet.”

Stan sighed in defeat as he undressed from the attire he was already wearing,” I’ll still be able to wear my hat, right? It’s cold out.”

“Don’t be so stupid hippy,” Cartman tutted,” you wear that damn thing everywhere.”

Cartman worked his magic until he was sure that it was perfect.

“Alright hippy, I’m taking the blindfold off now.”

The fabric was lifted from Stan’s eyes. He stared at himself in the mirror. Instead of his brown jacket, he wore a black, leather jacket with silver buttons . He wore a red, long sleeved shirt underneath and blue jeans, which were ripped at the knees. Instead of his poofball hat, Cartman brushed out his hair so it wasn’t a mess and looked decent. Instead of his black studs, Stan had silver diamonds in his ears. He also wore black boots that had black fur at the rim and a silver buckle at the side.

“Wow...” was all Stan could say.

“It’s nothing really. Not compared to the blue dress I had in store but I knew you would like this more,” Cartman smiled,” it has reminiscence of your faggy goth days but it’s actually stylish.”

“Thank you!” Stan leapt into Cartman’s arms,” I love it!”

“Knew you would. So are you ready to go. It’s already 5:30.”

“Yep let’s do this!”

 

Cartman drove Stan to the community centre a couple of blocks away. Stan played around with the radio to try and calm himself.

“How many people did you invite exactly?” Stan asked warily.

“Just about everyone in our year,” Cartman shrugged,” so like 100 people.”

“100? Goddammit Cartman!”

Shortly after, they pulled up at the community centre which was already full of cars. Cartman urged Stan out of the care and lead him into the huge hall. Nearly every nook and cranny had blue, red and black balloons and at least a group of people. The whole atmosphere had a cheerful aroma. There were tables scattered at the side of the huge dance floor in the middle of the huge venue. A massive sign saying ‘Happy 16th Stan!’ hung above the massive DJ area near the dance floor. The lights around were all in blues that flashed in all corners. Stan noticed as he waded through that there was a line of tables from the door to the end with masses of food, desserts, sodas and punch. Cartman also had to include a chocolate fountain with marshmallows and strawberries.

Cartman dragged Stan to the centre of the dance floor and ushered everyone off, leaving the two standing hand in hand. 

The crowds of people all screamed  
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY STAN!”

Stan took a microphone from a table and cleared his throat.

“Uhh thank you everyone for coming to this sweet party Eric prepared for me. I really do appreciate you all for being here and for making this party feel alive. And also thank you for bringing so many presents here for me!” Stan gestures towards the mountain of birthday presents in the corner.  
“So enough of me talking and let’s get this party started!”

Everyone cheered as the DJ who happened to be Big Gay Al began to play classic party hits.

Stan looked behind him to see Kyle and Kenny making there way over.

“Hey dude!” Kyle shouted to be heard from the blasting music,” this is a sick party and you look awesome!”

Stan chuckled,” thanks dude, Cartman prepared it after all.”

“We may think Cartman is a jackass but I’ll give him credit: he goes to great lengths for you, Stan,” Kenny chimed in.

“Ayyy,” Cartman jabbed Kenny’s side.

Kyle bit his lip,” he sure does. Well as long as you’re happy man, I’m ok with it.”

“Let’s dance then!” Kenny exclaimed joining in for the Macarena.

Stan and Kyle laughed as they began dancing too. Cartman stood behind and couldn’t stop thinking about how cute his boyfriend was 

After the song as over, Cartman tapped Stan’s shoulder.

“Want some punch or something?”

Stan thought,” sure why not.”

Cartman bumped into someone whilst walking over to the buffet. He swallowed nervously.

“Oh hey Eric,” Heidi Turner waved, “I haven’t seen you in a long time.”

“Hi Heidi,” Cartman returned the wave. He couldn’t be an asshole towards her: Stan would go bat-shit crazy!

“So I heard you’re dating guys now,” Heidi spoke in a near whisper, “ it’s nice to see you moved on.”

“Umm yeah. Stan’s my man,” Cartman replied hoarsely.

“So I’ll see ya around then,” she smiled.

“Ok.” Cartman hurried away from her. Why was she so damn nice to everyone? Heidi did lose all the weight she gained whilst dating Cartman and she made amends with all her friends. She moved on and become her old self again.

He got the punch from the table and rushed back to the dance floor.

“Y M C A” Stan sang along, dancing more than he has for years. Cartman gave him the punch.

“Thanks Cartman,” he grinned,” wanna join me?”

“Well I have nothing to lose.”

The punch made Stan more buzzed on the dance floor. Cartman admired his partner having himself a good time. Suddenly, he felt someone tap his shoulder.

“Cartman I need help,” Kenny whisper- shouted,” Ya know how Kyle is a light weight.”

“Yeah the jew can’t take more than 2 bottles.”

“Well he’s the Stan level of drunkness.”

“What? Stan isn’t drunk. He’s just buzzed,” Cartman snapped.

“I’m not saying Stan’s drunk dipshit. There’s levels to drunkness:  
Sober  
Buzzed  
Tipsy  
Drunk  
Shifaced  
Stan- level.”

“Eh?”

“We made up a new way of being drunk after we found Stan downing a bottle of whisky in 4th grade,” Kenny replied, “ and Kyle’s really fucking drunk dude.”

“Ok. Here’s my phone. Order him an Uber home,” Cartman handed his phone.

“Nah his mom will go psycho! I’ll take him back to my place: my parents aren’t home and Karen’s over at her friend Ruby’s house.”

“Ok. Just don’t make out with him. Don’t want jew germs to mix with your poor ones,” Cartman joked.

“Can’t make promises,” Kenny winked.

Cartman and Kenny helped Kyle in the Uber. Kyle insisted that he’d be alright but they ignored him. The night resumed and Stan didn’t get drunk! He decided to limit himself at only a few drinks so that he could at least remember this night for the future (and not do anything stupid).

Cartman suddenly had a bright idea and he suggested something to Big Gay Al, which he thought it was a super fabulous plan.

He proceeded to stand on a table with a microphone in his hands as I Swear began to play.

“Oh god,” Stan pinched the bridge of his nose.

Cartman looked directly at Stan and sang,  
“I swear, by the moon and the stars in the sky. I’ll be there Stan!  
And I swear, like the shadow that’s by your side. I swear to god I’ll be there. For better or worse, till death do us part. I’ll love you with every gay beat of my heart! I swear Stan.”

Everyone clapped and applauded the bold performance and Cartman swooped down and kissed Stan with passion on the dance floor.  
The crowd went wild. Phone cameras clicked and people screamed.

Stan parted away and stared with his gorgeous blue eyes into Cartman’s and turned a bright red.

“I remember this little stunt. You sang that to Kyle at that basketball game,” Stan chuckled, “ I see you haven’t changed.”

“Don’t even mention Kahl. I really meant every word I said. I love you so much Stanley.”

“I love you too Cartman.”

They embraced eachother in a warm hug and everyone cooed at the sweetness. 

“Who’s ready for cake?” Cartman shouted to the crowd.

They all piled over to the huge 3 tier cake that stood tall in the corner next to the presents. Stan gasped.  
It was blue with white buttercream frosting and a golden ‘16’ on the top. The first layer was strawberry, the second was chocolate and the third was vanilla.

“I made it myself,” Cartman boasted.

“You made that! Dude that’s awesome!” Stan awed.

They both cut the cake and shared it amongst the party guests. By the time they got to the third tier, everybody was full.

“Golly, Eric that was delicious,”  
Butters smiled,” you sure know how to bake.”

“I sure do. Anything for little hippy over here,” Cartman held onto Stan tight.

“Fatass you’re squishing me!” Stan squirmed.

The part carried on until way after 1 o clock in the morning. Once the hall was vacant, Cartman glances over to Stan.

“How was it then?”

“Fucking. Amazing,” Stan breathed,” Thanks for everything.”

“No problem. Let’s get all of the presents into the car... somehow and play with Lance for a bit.”

“Sounds like a plan to me.”


	5. Proposal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cartman gathers his friends (Kyle, Butters and Kenny) to help him with his plan. 
> 
> All he can hope is that Stan will like it.

“Why did you call us over Fatass,” Kyle asked angrily.

Cartman glared at the redhead,” Shut up you filthy jew: it’s for something important.”

“But it’s nearly Christmas dude. I still need to make Karen and Butters their presents,” Kenny frowned,” and why didn’t you invite Stan over?”

Kyle rolled his eyes,” Stan probably found out how much of a fucking idiot he is and broke up with him.

“I swear to god Kahl, if I wasn’t in a good mood: I would kick your ass,” Cartman snarled,” anyways it is about Stan.”

Kyle and Kenny sat on either side of their friend to hear what he had to say. For once in his life, Cartman seemed uneasy or scared ,even. He swallowed nervously, pulling at his collar.

“Right, so me and Stan have been dating for 8 years. I honestly love him more than anyone and... goddammit. IM GONNA PROPOSE TO HIM,” Cartman shouted.

Silence struck the room. The other two boys sat with their mouths agape: processing what was just said. Kyle rose from his seat and paced around the living room, tugging at his auburn curls. Kenny looked like he was to die of spontaneous combustion right there and then. 

Kenny decided to brake the awkward silence,” dude I’m happy for you! But we’re only 20: there’s still plenty of time to get married and stuff. Also, we still have college. Isn’t Stan getting a veterinarian degree?”

“I know. I know. I just thought that it was a good time to propose. My mom let me borrow some cash to buy the ring. I want you guys to tag along,” Cartman announced,” that’s the only reason why I invited the jew here: he knows what Stan likes more than anyone.”

Kyle stopped walking and glared at the fat boy,” you know what Cartman, I got used to you dating my best friend- actually my SUPER best friend. I thought that was long as Stan’s happy and not depressed, he’ll be ok. I convinced myself that this relationship would be what’s best for his well being: his mental health. Then, you pull this shit and want to propose to him,” Kyle shifted his gaze to a picture of all of the boys as children, playing in the snow. Kenny was trying to climb on top of the snowman, Cartman throwing a snowball in Kyle’s face and Stan getting buried in the snow by Butters.It brought back so many memories.

“It’s hard for me ok? All I can see is the 8 year old boy who’s quite innocent and clueless every time I see Stan. Our friendship group hasn’t changed since pre school. Its hard seeing the person that’s closest to me as not just friends, as brothers, get proposed by the other person I’ve known all my life. Imagining both of you as fiancés, hell even husbands is just... overwhelming.” 

Before anything else was said, Butters burst through the door, red in the face. He shrugged off his turquoise jacket and sat on the floor.

“Hey fellas,” he greeted cheerfully,” sorry I’m late. I just had to help my dad-“

“God will you shut up Butters?” Cartman demanded.”

“Hey! Don’t be a dick, Fatass,” Kenny fired back. He turned towards Butters.

“Don’t listen to him Buttercup, you can come and sit on my lap if ya want.”

“Get a room,” Cartman murmured.

“Gee thanks Ken,” Butters smiled as he sat on Kenny’s knee,” so what did I miss?”

“I’m proposing to Stan,” Cartman nonchalantly boasted,” and Kahl did this hella long speech about growing up with us or something.”

Kyle looked as though he was about to explode but decided to keep his cool. Taking deep breaths he sat back in his seat.

“I didn’t say you couldn’t propose though. I know that he’d be thrilled. All I meant was-“

“Yeah. Yeah. Ya see Kahl, no one really gives a shit,” Cartman interrupted,” anyways, are you guys gonna come with me to the jewellery store to buy the engagement ring.”

“Yeah,” Kenny and Butters spoke in unison. Cartman turned to Kyle.

“Jew?”

Kyle sighed,” fine. Only for Stan’s sake though.”

“It’s settled. We’re heading out now.”

“Now? It’s like 6:30. Stores close at 9,” Kenny checked his watch.

“Well, Stan’s out with his family in Denver so this is the perfect opportunity to go,” Cartman replied.

“Let’s hurry then fellas,” Butters grabbed his jacket. The boys followed suit. 

At the jewellery store:

All four boys gazed at all the beautiful jewels that were concealed in glass casings. Cartman naturally hovered over the engagement rings. He gawked at how pristine and expensive they were. A young shop assistant smiled at her customer.

“Hello sir, I see that your eyes are on our engagement rings. Who’s the lucky lady?”

“Actually it’s a man. I’m looking for something... kewl,” Cartman replied.

“A man? I guess there’s a lot of gay couples around nowadays. Against the bible, but what can we do about it,” the women shook her head.

“What the fuc-“ Kyle rushed over and placed a hand over Cartman’s mouth.

“Sorry, ma’am. We’re just looking for a ring. Something with a blue diamond,” Kyle interrupted.

The women nodded and sauntered off to find the ring. Kyle punched Cartman’s arm.

“Son ova bitch,” Cartman murmured , rubbing his arm.

“Don’t be an asshole, Fatass,” Kyle hissed,” we’re not here to pick fights.”

“Whatever jew,” Cartman snapped.

The women came back with a stunning ring. It was a black coloured gold band encrusted with dazzling blue diamonds running through the middle, the same colour of the tranquil sea. It shone brightly in the light and gave a blue glow. Cartman and Kyle both awed at the sight.

“This is awesome,” Cartman grinned,” he’d love it!”

“He sure would. How much is this?” Kyle asked politely.

“Around $2000,” the woman bluntly replied.

Kyle’s mouth formed in a line. He was in utter shock. Cartman wouldn’t pay this. He’ll try to manipulate to get it cheaper.

“Ok. Will you take cash and debt card?” Cartman calmly said.

“Sure,” the women brought him over to the till to complete the transaction. The ring was placed in a black, velvet box with a red cushioned surface inside. Kyle was flabbergasted. Why didn’t Cartman protest?

After the women served them, Kyle rose an eyebrow at the other boy.

“How the hell did you afford that?”

“My moms credit card. No biggie.”

“Dude, if Stan finds out that you payed two grand for that ring, he’ll go crazy! He’ll bring it back,” Kyle exclaimed,” I feel so much sympathy for your poor mother.”

“Shut up Kahl. I’ll pay her back eventually,” Cartman rolled his eyes,” and Stan won’t find out if you don’t rat me out.”

The continued to bicker as per usual as they waited for Kenny and Butters to stop pouring over charms.

“I’ll buy you one, one day,” Kenny promised, holding Butters hand.

“It’s ok Ken, you don’t have to do that,” Butters giggled softly,” I’m thankful for anything you do for me.”

“Awww that’s so sweet you guys, why don’t you get a room and make out for a while,” Cartman laughed.

“Didn’t you say that in 4th grade?” Kyle sighed,” to me and Stan.”

Kenny whipped his head to the others,” things never change.”

They all chuckled between eachother and reminisced on past adventures as they drove back to Cartman’s house. It would’ve been more fun with Stan but Cartman was going to see him on Saturday- when he proposes.

December 23rd- 

Night was falling on the small mountain town. The stars littered the night sky, giving a luminous glow. Without them, the sky would be a deep, dark abyss like the realms of space. It was snowy that night (as usual), but it wasn’t a storm this time. Instead, delicate snowflakes waltzes from the heavens and gave the Winter feeling. Since Christmas was around the corner, everyone’s Christmas decorations were up and gave that festive season life. 

Cartman knocked on Stan’s door with a genuine smile on his face. The raven answered the door with haste and returned the smile. He was already dressed in a brown jacket and red scarf. For once his hat wasn’t on his head.

“Are you ready to go then hippy?” Cartman offered his hand.

“Sure am ,Fatass,” Stan chuckled as Cartman lead him to the car. Cartman instantly started the ignition and began to head off. Stan turned on the radio to listen to nostalgic Christmas songs:most from his childhood. 

As they drove on the vast motorway, Cartman decided to spark a conversation,” So how was Denver?”

“It sucked ass dude. Shelly threw my hat in a trash can because I was ‘annoying her with my gay stories’. She’s such a bitch! Don’t even get me started with Dad: he acted like a jackass the entire time. Me and mom were so embarrassed,” Stan sighed.

“What did you expect from Randy? He’s always acting like a jackass.”

“I guess so. Wait... I usually drive us everywhere. What’s the special occasion,” Stan lifted his eyebrow in confusion.

“You’ll see.”

They continued the journey whilst bellowing Christmas songs to their hearts content. They soon pulled up to the light show that was held every Christmas. The boys jumped out the car and walked hand in hand through the side enterance. They went to the other side: the side that was hidden from most. Cartman brought Stan to a pathway with lanterns lining each side, radiating an orange glow. Trees with golden covered lights scattered on either side and shone brightly. Stan looked around and grinned at Cartman.

“This is beautiful Eric. You really out don’t yourself. But, are we gonna watch the fireworks?”

“We will. There’s something I need to show you first.”

Stan and Cartman carried on down the dimly lit path until they reached a small bridge with blue lights draped over. The boys slowly strolled over. Stan looked over the bridge to see a lake beneath them. The surface of the water ripples gently with the cold breeze. 

Stan shivered slightly. Cartman noticed and wrapped his red coat over Stan’s smaller form. 

“Won’t you be cold too?” Stan asked.

“Nah. I’m fine. I’m tough skinned and I came prepared,” Cartman gestured to the massive hoodie he was wearing.

They neared the end of the bridge. In the distance, a grand oak tree stood proudly on the other side of the lake. That tree was also covered in golden lights. The snow added the Christmas vibe. Stan was in awe at the sight.

“Wow,” was all he could muster.

Cartman held his hand tighter and paced at a faster speed to get next to the tall tree. Beside it was a small Gizibo. They reached it and they hurried on to the wooden structure. Cartman turned to face his boyfriend.

“So here we are Stan. I remembered you telling me how you always wanted to come here during the holidays but we were always caught up in crazy adventures to come here” Cartman began,” there’s a reason why I brought you here tonight.”

Stan gazed back and nodded, “What is it?”

“Well... you are the best thing that’s came into my life. I cherished all the time we spend together. Every moment. Like the time we broke the beaver dam or when you fought to stop hurting whales and I came on the show. Even though you mostly were with the Jew when we were kids, I still enjoyed your company. Then, I fell for you. I realised that you made complete. I know it sounds totally gay but it’s true. We hung out more often and I found out way more about you like how much you care for animals. I noticed how you weren’t like the other assholes.”

“I want to spend the rest of my life with you and hold you every night knowing that your mine.” 

Cartman crouched down to one knee and brought out the velvet box. He carefully opened it to reveal the ring. 

“Stanley Marsh, will you marry me?”

Stan froze for a moment with utter shock. Tears fell down his cheeks as he brushed back his black hair. Those few moments seemed like a lifetime. Cartman was on edge on what Stan’s answer was.

“Yes,” Stan whispered wiping his eyes. 

Cartman took Stan’s left hand and slipped the black, diamond encrusted ring onto his finger. He rose from the crouching position and twirled Stan in his arms. They cried from joy as they spun around. 

“This is the best day of my life!” Cartman shouted at the top of his lungs.

They both laughed as they came to a stop. Cartman cupped Stan’s chin and kissed him under the star light. Stan leaned into it and passionately kissed back. Cartman broke away and looked up to the sky to see the first few fireworks go off.

“Shit, we’re late for the display. We need to get there to see it first hand,” Cartman cursed.

“Come on then. We need to get the fire crackers from the stands,” Stan tugged at Cartman’s wrist,” and then we can get some KFC in the way back and I’ll come over to your house to sleep.”

Cartman winked,” sounds good to me.”


	6. Left Behind.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Omega/Beta/Alpha dynamics.
> 
> Cartman left Stan years ago, leaving not just him but his child too. He comes back to South Park 4 years later to try to make amends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry it’s been so long. I came up with this idea just so I had something to post.   
> It’s so out of character so I’m sorry about that.  
> It’s just a side chapter and it doesn’t affect any of the others so don’t worry XD

Being an omega was difficult. Especially when most people around you are either beta or alpha. But you somehow come to terms with it. Though sometimes it just bites you in the ass...

20 year old Stan Marsh was cleaning up the leftover dishes from the family dinner. Humming along to a random song from his playlist, he didn’t notice his 4 year old son come running behind him. 

“Daddy, look what I drew today,” the little boy exclaimed.

Stan turned around and crouched down, “Hey Theo, let me see.”

His son thrust the piece of paper in his hands.

“We had to draw what we love most so I drew you, Uncle Kyle, Uncle Kenny and grandma!

Stan smiled softly and hugged his son tight. “It’s awesome. When Uncle Kyle comes round, you’ll have to show him.”

Theo’s chocolate brown eyes twinkled from the thought. Stan ruffled his black hair which made him giggle.

“Alright champ, I’m going to finish this cleaning then we can do whatever you want. Want to help?”

Theo nodded enthusiastically and squealed with delight as his dad lifted him onto the counter, next to the sink. Stan let Theo play around with the bubbles for a bit whilst he cleaned up. Then, Theo stopped playing and tapped Stan’s shoulder.

“Daddy, everyone else at school has another papa or mama. Why don’t I?” Theo questioned curiously.

Stan froze. His eyes widened significantly: all life seemed to drown out of him at that moment. He knew that this would be asked eventually but he hoped it would be much later. 

Memories of what happened flooded his mind. Suddenly, he broke down in tears and sank to the floor. Theo gasped as he scrambled from the counter and onto his fathers lap where he clung onto his father’s neck.

“Daddy don’t cry. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you sad.”

“N-no Theo, it’s not your fault. Never blame yourself. Daddy is ok. Just a little down but he’ll be ok,” Stan reassured in between tears.

He didn’t know how to explain this to his son: that his other dad abandoned them both just after he gave birth. 

Fucking Eric Cartman. Tearing their family apart even though he’s not here. Stan couldn’t help but feel the hatred building up inside. He was left to look after their only son. They were only in high school and Stan was working towards getting a degree to be a vet. At least his mother and best friends were there to help with the support. He still lives with his mom and dad. 

Sharon still works as a receptionist and makes most the income. Randy does random shit whenever something new happens in the town and Stan didn’t really care anymore. Stan did have a weekend job at the local animal shelter and he loved it. It helps him rewind from the stress of his college courses and raising a child as a single parent.

Shelly comes around with her husband Kevin (Kenny’s brother) at times. They still have a sibling rivalry but they get along better, well ever since Theo was born. Stan’s still very wary of her being around him though since she was abusive towards him when they grew up.

As for his friends, Kyle’s getting a law degree with his girlfriend Wendy. It was strange since Wendy was an alpha and Kyle was also an alpha. Everyone thought that their strong personalities might clash but here they are. Kenny is dating Butters and living at an apartment block just outside of town. Kenny is a beta and Butters is an omega so it worked out. Stan still kept in touch with everyone he went to school with, well except from Fatass. It seemed like he got closer to everyone when they left school which was weird but he didn’t question it.

It was hard looking after Theo at first. Every time Stan looked at him, he saw that asshole. They named him after Cartman’s middle name: Theodore. He had Cartman’s eyes and nose but he resembled Stan in more ways. He had messy black hair and Stan’s slim figure. Theo’s personality was split though. When he is angry, he gets temperamental and challenging like Cartman. The rest of the time, he had Stan’s mentality: calm and intelligent. Stan was certain that he would be a genius with Stan’s common sense and Cartman’s malicious, yet tactic-full smarts.

Stan always was baffled at the split resemblance even though Theo’s never met Cartman in his life.

“It’s just us two for now dude. I’ll try my best,” Stan wiped away the stray tears and gave a fake smile to try to brighten the situation, “ anyways, we should play some Red Dead 2.”

“Yes! I love you daddy,” Theo scurried to the bedroom he and Stan shared and sat in anticipation in front of the TV.

Stan sighed with relief. He can hear Kyle scolding him now for letting his son play adult games. He didn’t really care though, it’s only a video game and he understands that he shouldn’t shoot people in the street. They done much worse at his age, like accidentally burning their teacher and blaming it on a psychopath. 

Stan was about to follow his son when a knock was heard from the front door. Assuming it was either Kyle or his mom, he went to answer it.

But stood there was Eric Cartman.

“Hey Stan-“ Cartman was cut off by Stan angrily slamming the door in his face. He continued to bang on the door.

“Fuck off fatass. I don’t ever want to see your face again,” Stan shouted from the other side.

“Come on I just want to talk,” Cartman stated, “and I need to see you again.”

Stan rolled his eyes but caved and opened the door. “Couple of minutes then leave. My son will be worried.”

“Thanks hippy, still as pissy as you were in high school. Well the Jew will be twice as bad,” Cartman snickered as he sat on the couch, “ wow your house still hasn’t changed.”

“Ok cut the bullshit Cartman. Why are you here?” Stan hissed.

“I moved back to South Park. Business studies are boring,” Cartman yawned, “how’s everything for you?”

“Oh everything is cool. I’m just struggling to provide for me and our son and have to deal with him not having another parent. And I still have depression but I can’t do anything because I care too much about Theo. SO YEAH EVERYTHING IS GREAT ERIC,” Stan screamed with frustration, turning red.

Cartman looked stunned, “I missed you both. I really did Stan. I’ve felt awful for leaving you two behind.”

“Cartman you left without saying anything. Do you know how fucking scary it is to be a male omega? I hate going out by myself. Also, having a kid when I was just a child myself doesn’t make things any better.”

“I couldn’t deal with the stress Stan. And I needed to get myself a life to provide things for you two,” Cartman tried to explain, “ please just take me back.”

“You really expect that if you waltz in here and declare your love that I’ll take you back?” Stan spat with hate.

“Yes,” Cartman shrugged, “it worked with Heidi.”

“WE WERE IN FOURTH GRADE YOU STUPID ASSHOLE. IM NOT HEIDI AND I WILL NOT LET YOU WALK ALL OVER ME LIKE MY MOM LETS MY DAD,” Stan shouted with fury.

Cartman covered Stan’s mouth with his hand, “shh Stan you’re being too loud.”

It was too late. Theo walked in on the ruckus and ran to aid his dad.

“Stop trying to hurt daddy,” Theo screamed at Cartman whilst failing his arms around. Stan pushed away from the hand and picked up his son.

“It’s ok, he’s not hurting me. He’s just came for a chat that’s all,” Stan patted his head, “I’ll walk you to Uncle Kyle’s house for a little while.”

“What about you?” Theo looked up with giant puppy dog eyes which made Stan nearly melt.

“I’ll get everything sorted out, bud. I’m strong and so are you,” he smirked, “and I’ll ask Kyle if you can stay over. How does that sound?”

“Yay!” Theo jumped out from his arms and ran around the room with glee written all over his face.

Stan walked over to put on his brown hoodie and black scarf and dressed Theo in his old blue and red poofball hat and blue jacket.

“Coming Fatass?” Stan offered, holding the door open. Cartman nodded and followed the two outside.

They all walked in silence during the short walk. It didn’t last long however when Kyle opened the front door.

“Hey dude and little dude,” Kyle smiled, “how’s to going?”

Stan signalled to where Cartman was standing. Kyle’s face burned in fury at the sight. He knew everything that happened between them.

“Wendy. Can you get little Theo for me?” Kyle called. Wendy came rushing down the stairs and glanced over Stan’s shoulder and frowned.

“Hey Stan, why is Eric there?” Wendy asked whilst leading Theo away from the scene.

“I’ll let Kyle tell you later. I don’t want to make it more difficult,” Stan whispered so Cartman didn’t hear.  
Wendy nodded and rubbed Stan’s shoulder as a way to give him support before she walked away.

Kyle made it his cue to shut the door and approach the other alpha waiting by the letterbox.

“Who do you think you are coming back here?” Kyle snapped, trying his hardest to contain himself and not punch the smug bastard in the face.

“I came back because I felt bad for what I did to hippy,” Cartman bit back, “ and what’s it got to do with sneaky Jews like you.”

Kyle swung his fist but Stan grabbed his hand before any damage was done.

“Kyle, you’re going to get yourself arrested dude!” Stan exclaimed whilst attempted to hold back the raging redhead.

“I don’t give a shit! Your my best friend Stan and he basically ruined your life these past 4 years.”

“This is like a damn drama for gods sake,” Cartman huffed, “ just go away Kahl and let me-“

“No. You’re not going anywhere near him,” Kyle growled, “I refuse to let you touch him and ruin him again.”

“He consented!” Cartman deadpanned, “ we agreed and it was an accident. I didn’t even think about the fact that he’s an omega!”

“Like you could forget that fact. He has a scent you ignorant idiot. Your instincts kicked in and you won’t admit it,” Kyle pushes away from Stan’s grasp and stared into Cartman’s hazel eyes with his emerald green ones. 

“Get out of my person space Kahl,” Cartman warned.

“I will if you fuck off and die in a hole Fatass,” Kyle retaliated.

“Guys. Guys, stop it,” Stan bridged his nose in disbelief, “I don’t want civil war for the love of god. I hate always having to be the peacemaker between you two. Where’s Kenny and Butters when you need them?”

Kyle pulled back and gave a death glare to his rival.

“Call me if anything happens and I’ll kill him,” Kyle told Stan as he went back to his house.

“Ha! Knew you couldn’t step up Jew boy,” Cartman laughed.

“You’re so immature. I don’t know what I even saw in you,” Stan muttered,” let’s go to Starks Pond or something.”

“Sounds good.”

The two walked away from the residence and Cartman decided to strike up a conversation.

“So, has anyone marked you yet?” He asked casually.

“What kind of question is that?” Stan spoke, repulsed, “you already did that.”

“I know, I was just wondering if you liked someone else.”

“I’ve been too busy lately to even think about dating,” Stan replied sharply, “it’s difficult with people trying to pray on you all the time though.”

“Who?” Cartman seemed jealous. Or protective. Stan couldn’t tell.

“Just people who smell my scent I guess. I wish I wasn’t an omega.”

“Yeah, I remember when everyone began to show and you locked yourself in your room for like a week,” Cartman remised.

“Yeah, it was so embarrassing. It was hell. Everyone expected me to be a beta but here I am,” Stan shrugged, “I take supplements so it’s not so bad anymore.”

Cartman looked at the slightly shorter boy next to him. The years have treated him well he’s noticed. He still feels like he’ll drown in his ocean blue eyes and his hair is just as soft as it always was. He hasn’t changed much yet Cartman is more attracted to him more than ever.

“So, I see that Theo’s grown up since I last saw him,” Cartman tried to act natural.

“Well you haven’t seen him since he was like a month old so yeah he has I guess.”

“Stan again, I’m so sorry for abandoning you and our kid. I should’ve stayed but I messed up and left you both without help,” Cartman looked ashamed to the point he wanted to sink into the ground,” please give me another chance to be a better dad.”

“This reminds me of my dad, ya know. You resemble him a lot Eric. And not in a good way,” Stan furrowed his eyebrows in dismay,” my mom always gave him a second chance but my family has always been dysfunctional. Without a doubt he would screw up like cause an uproar in town and we would have to fix it. I don’t want to restart that cycle,” Stan sighed, “I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to let Theo live without another parent in his life and he’s so much like you. And I missed you too.”

Cartman held Stan’s hands, “I promise Stanley Marsh that I will be a good father and a better partner to you. Just like before.”

Stan pondered, “really? You really mean it?”

“Yes! Please let me restart. I can be the person you wanted me to be. I was stupid and young but now I want this.”

“It’ll take a while. For us all to get used to this. But it’s worth a shot,” Stan smiled genuinely for the first time in awhile. 

Cartman embraced him in a hug. Stan didn’t know how to make out of this but he knew life will improve. He has his son and his friends. Even Cartman has seemed to change.

Maybe being an omega wasn’t so bad after all...


End file.
